Wedding Roles and Responsibilities: Who Does What?

The main responsibility of the bride and the groom is to get married. However, there are many planning decisions to be made for the big day that involves the two. The bride and the groom often plan and make decisions together in setting the budget, choosing the date, and the site for the wedding, among other key issues. Besides, other parties will play a critical role on the wedding day. 

I. Why You Need a Wedding Party

One of the main reasons people conduct weddings is to celebrate the journey of love. A wedding ceremony brings the couple together to celebrate their love story with their families and close friends. It is one of the most defining moments of a person's life and therefore requires good preparation. 

The process of planning a wedding can be overwhelming when you do not know where to begin. Wedding preparation requires a clear picture of what is expected to make the day a success. Many wedding planning processes begin immediately after the engagement. Since wedding preparation involves a series of events, you need a support system that will keep you calm through the whole process to the wedding day. Having a wedding party is one of the best decisions you can make to ease the whole process.

What is a Wedding Party?

A wedding party is typically made of the bride, the groom, and those who will be beside them on the big day. The party plays a critical role in cheering up the couple and makes them remain focused on the wedding day.

Wedding party members consist of close friends, siblings, and relatives who will oversee the planning to ensure the wedding day will be memorable.

When choosing a wedding party, the bride and the groom need to work together and develop a list of trusted people who will provide them with emotional, moral, and even financial support to make beautiful memories of the day. It is essential to select individuals who will be happy to guide and provide support even after the wedding.

The best people to select for the wedding party are those who have walked with you through thick and thin. Many successful weddings have been facilitated by having a selfless team ready and willing to help the bride and the groom grow in their love life. Members of the wedding party have designated unique roles to facilitate the main wedding event's success.

II. Wedding Roles and Who is Eligible for the Roles 

For a wedding to be successful, different people take different roles, and each role plays a significant role in making the event a success. The following are some of the key players and their roles.

1. The Bride's Parents - The bride's parents are important guests who are also involved in the wedding planning process. They will help the bride develop a list of trusted members to make the wedding a successful event.

   The bride's mother plays an essential role on the wedding day and the wedding event's lead-up to the big day. The bride's mother is often the most influential in deciding the wedding dress and will help the bride to dress up for her wedding. She will also spend the entire day with the bride and prepare to walk down the aisle. She may also give a speech at the wedding reception.

   In the past, the bride's father would assist in paying the wedding expenses. However, things have changed in recent times, as the cost may be distributed between the two families and the couples. The bride's father has two essential responsibilities: giving a speech at the reception and participating in the father-daughter dance.

2. The Groom's Parents - The groom's parents are responsible for calling and scheduling a visit with the parents to the bridegroom. One of the prominent roles is to offer guidance and moral support to the groom.

   The groom's mother should be there to provide moral support and guidance to the groom. In the wedding planning process, she can advise and welcome the wedding committee members to the groom's homestead. On the wedding day, she may be given a chance to give a speech.

   Typically the father to the groom may not have formal responsibilities. However, he can assist in the wedding planning process. He also provides moral and financial support to facilitate the success of the wedding. The father may be given the responsibility of welcoming guests and making them feel comfortable. Besides, he may also be required to give a speech during the wedding and reception events.

3. Bridesmaids - These are volunteer members of the wedding party who dedicate their time and energy to assisting the couple to achieve their dream wedding. The bridesmaids are important people in wedding preparation since they color the wedding. Their sole responsibilities involve:

   • Providing support to the bride.
   • Offering advice during the wedding planning process.
   • Coordinating with the maid of honor in various activities.

The maid of honor plays an important role in identifying the bridesmaids.

One of the critical considerations in the selection process is the height of the bridesmaid. Mature girls aged above 16 years are preferred to take over the responsibilities.

One of the requirements of being a bridesmaid is the ability to cater to expenses incurred in the purchase of marching outfits. The bridesmaid may be girls of the same age group or different age groups.

The bridesmaid needs to have almost the same heights for uniformity purposes. These ladies play a unique role in entertaining the guests during the procession with dance moves. They may surround either the bride or the groom and take quality pictures for memories.

Bridesmaids Before the Wedding

Even before the wedding day, the bridesmaids have responsibilities, and some of them are the following:

• Supporting the maid of honor to complete the assigned duties.
• Taking responsibilities willingly, right from pre-wedding preparation, shopping for bridesmaid gift boxes, wedding merchandise, bridesmaid gifts, garments ordering and making payments.
• Assisting in the decision-making process by giving their inputs on what needs to be done to make the D-day a success.
• Attending the rehearsal parties and giving their best performance to entertain invitees.

Bridesmaids On the D-Day:

• Helping in the decoration of the venue with flowers and balloons
• Putting on makeup and matching outfits to beautify the day.
• Participating dance moves before the wedding proceedings begin.
• Engaging the bride and the groom in procession dances to cheer them up.
• Taking the bride and the groom to the reception for photo sessions and video shooting.
• The bridesmaid may also assist in clearing the venue after the wedding.

Assistant Bridesmaids/Groomsmen

If you want your wedding to be an exciting day, the assistant maids can be part of the wedding planning to beautify the event. The group may consist of young boys and girls dedicated to serving as assistants. The participants should have matching attire because they share the platform with the newly-wed couple.

1. Flower Girl - The responsibility is to scatter flower petals along the bridle path. Traditionally, she is an adorable girl between the age of four and eight. During the procession, she leads the bride and joyfully scatters beautiful decorations and flowers down the aisle. However, modern weddings have evolved, and any lady of any age can serve as a flower girl in a wedding. The modern-day flower girl is not limited to any age.

   The flower girl should be part of rehearsals before the D-day to perform her roles confidently. Flower girl's kin has an obligation to bear the cost for the purchase of the attire. Many flower girls come from close relatives of the bride or groom who voluntarily accept to make the wedding colorful.

2. Page Boy - The page boy is a youngster below the age of ten who could be a nephew, a younger brother, or the son of your close friends. The page boy has traditionally been part of the wedding ceremony and walks down the aisle alongside the flower girl. One of the page boy's main responsibilities is to appear cute and adorable in the wedding photographs. The page boy may also have the additional responsibility of performing the ring bearer's roles if the budget does not allow the page boy and ring bearer's to be included.

3. Ring Bearer/ Holder - A ring bearer could be a young person who holds the ring until the right moment. In many traditional weddings, a bearer is usually a young person aged seven years and not above ten. The rings are presented to the right-hand people of the bride and the groom to facilitate ring wearing. The master of the ceremony may serve as the officiator for the ring exchange event.

4. The Ushers - The ushers are close friends or relatives of the groom or the bride. Their primary duties and responsibilities include:

   • Assisting in the coordination of the wedding to run smoothly,
   • Making sure the guests have seats
   • Distributing the wedding programs to the guests,
   • Guiding the guest in the right direction throughout the day.

   The ushers can also assist the best man with planning the central dais and can be the excellent test audience for the best man's speech.

5. Candle Lighter - A candle lighter should arrive before the bride and the groom. The candle lighter is to ignite the stage where the official wedding event will be taking place. A family member or a friend, irrespective of age, can serve the role.
6. Reader - The purpose of the reader is to convey the message of love and happiness at the event. Readers can recite poems to entertain the guests. There are no restrictions, and anyone can be a reader. Some of the people who can be appointed as readers may be close relatives from either the bride's or the groom's side. Often the readers set the rhythm for the wedding. They should be confident to entertain the guests present at the wedding.
7. Officiant - The officiant is one of the most important people at any wedding. They are in charge of ensuring that the newly-wed take their vows in front of the guests. Today, anyone can assume an officiant's role provided that they are aware of what is required to be said by the bride and the groom. In religious ceremonies, the leaders of the respective religion conduct the vows.
8. The Bride and the Groom- The bride and the groom are the chief guests, and their main goal is to go down the aisle and start living together. Before their most important day arrives, they have critical responsibilities to work out, primarily planning.

A. Main Roles of the Bride and Groom from Preparation until the Wedding

1. Setting the budget- The bride and the groom need to work together to develop the wedding day's budget. They are responsible for planning the number of people expected at their wedding, the expenditure on food and beverages, wedding gowns, and everything that touches on the big day's expenditure. Setting the budget is an essential part of determining whether the day will be a success or a flop.
2. Choosing the wedding venue- They have to decide on the venue, the date, and the time. Since a wedding is conducted only once, having a dream wedding is a priority for everyone. A dream wedding involves selecting the best venues where the bride and the groom will take their vows. It also involves setting dates for the wedding and reception venue. The bride and the groom must agree on the dates and venues to be communicated later to the guests.
3. Meeting the ceremony's officiants- The bride and groom need to schedule an appointment with officials who will officiate their wedding and plan for the day. The officials may include religious leaders who will officiate the vows, master of ceremony, attorneys, and others.
4. Coordination of the invitees, video, and photography- The bride and groom are responsible for sending invitation letters to the important people in their lives. They should also plan on photography or the video personnel who will capture the moments for future reference. They also need to shop for wedding bands and capture their vows.
5. Sending appreciation notes for the presents received- The new couple's responsibility is to send thank you notes for gifts received from various guests. Thank you notes are an appreciation to people who made the wedding a success. The bride and the groom should craft thank you notes and send them to the wedding Whatsapp group or other social media platform created specifically for their wedding.

B. Who Helps the Bride

To overcome the fears and anxiety of facing the crowd, the bride is assisted by another lady who can be her former classmate or personal friend. The lady of honor has various duties and responsibilities as outlined below.

The Maid / Matron of Honor

She can be defined as the primary assistant to the bride during the wedding ceremony. She is tasked with providing moral support and making the bride comfortable and relaxed. If she is not married, she is referred to as the maid of honor. A married female assistant to the bride is referred to as the matron of honor. She is the right-hand woman and the go-to person in case the bride needs anything. The right-hand lady can be the sister to the bride, a close friend, or a former classmate.

Before the Wedding

The following are some of the responsibilities of the matron of honor:

• She provides help and advice during the wedding planning process.
• Coordinates the activities of the bridesmaids. She delegates responsibilities to bridesmaids and supervises them.
• Participates in pre-wedding functions with the bride.
• She attends the wedding rehearsal and is actively involved in the bachelorette's dinner.

 On the Wedding Day

• As the right-hand lady, she ensures the bride is relaxed and calm.
• She signs the marriage official documents and the certificate and guides the bride in signing.
• She is responsible for the bride's hair and makeup during the wedding to ensure the bride looks good.
• She engages in the dance to light up the event with the bridegroom's best right-hand man.

C. Who Helps the Groom?

The groom's right-hand man is the best man. Typically, he's a close friend to the groom or could be a relative. He is there to offer support and assistance at the wedding and even before the wedding.

The Groom's Best Man

Just as the bride gets help from the maid, the best man serves an assistant's role to the groom. He keeps the groom company and helps him to be calm before and at the wedding.

Before the wedding 

• He assists in coordinating the groomsmen's attire.
• He coordinates the ushers and organizes the bachelor's night party.
• He ensures everything about the honeymoon is sorted out.

On the Wedding Day

• He is the groom's right-hand man and ensures that the groom arrives at the designated venue early.
• The best man is the witness, carries the bride's ring, and signs the official marriage certificate.
• The best man coordinates the groomsmen's activities, colors the wedding ceremony by dancing with his counterpart during the reception.
• The right-hand man also ensures that the getaway car is readily available.

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